I just saw Julie and Julia this weekend ( I know, it takes us a while...) and I really enjoyed it. I've heard from others that they loved Julia but didn't care for Julie. I was no different. Why is that?
Sure, Meryl Streep is an actress at the top of her field and portrayed Julia so well. But, Amy Adams is also a good actress who portrayed her character well ( the little I know of her in real life).
For me, the big difference in feeling about the characters has less to do with the actors and more to do with the people they played. Julia is bubbly, joyful, abundant, clear, passionate. She is true to herself and stopped caring what others think early in her life. She loves her husband Paul with a passion and still loves herself enough to go for what she wanted in life.
Julie is portrayed as someone who complains, suffers, is victimized, is lost and confused. She is never satisfied with herself or her husband. She makes goals but gets lost in them. The journey is not fun for her. It becomes a burden that must always be validated and approved. She worships Julia as her savior and becomes little obsessed.
No wonder everyone prefers Julia! Julia represents our HigherSelves. She embodies the qualities that we aspire to- she is forever optimistic, honest, loyal, true, and never runs from the obstacles put in her way. She is forever faithful to herself and her knowing that it's all fine the way it is-even in dire circumstances.
Julie represents our egos. She embodies our tendency to see the trouble in things, the pressures that we create, the dependence we have on others for approval or validation, and our focus on the outside to dictate the inside.
Eventually, Julie triumphs but not without a whole lot of trouble. Julia has fun in her work and everything corresponds to that- her husband hangs out with her in the kitchen, fellow chefs find her and seek her out, a friend helps her find a publisher for her cookbook.
We don't want to think of Julie because she reminds us (or maybe just me)of that part of myself (the egoic part) that I buy into when things are going "badly" or "too well".
But, it is good that she is there. She highlights the Julia in us and when Julie does finally get what she wants, it is only because she shifts into Julia mode- she starts to enjoy the ride!
Are you Julia or Julie right now? Clear or confused, focused or scattered, confident and calm or worried? Watch Julia and Julie and get inspired to shift into Julia mode.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Monday, August 24, 2009
No Problem and 10,000 Solutions
I went to the movies recently and a 7 year old child said "Wouldn't it be cool if there was a movie and the story was about about no problem and 10,000 solutions?"
I immediately thought that she had started to read the Tao Te Ching or was channeling Lao-Tzu.
She explained further about what she meant. To paraphrase, the story would be that someone would be just living their life and get something really cool (like an ice cream cone) and be thrilled.
I agreed that, yes, that would be "super cool".
And maybe, that's how it can be, if we allow ourselves to see it that way.
Perhaps our lives can be without problems and 10,000 solutions. In other words, we can see life's challenges as just that- not problems or dramas, but challenges and opportunities to view the unlimited solutions that are available if we can get out of "problem mode" and into "solution mode".
I know it can be a challenge, at times, to see what is happening in your life as an opportunity. In fact, in the moment, it may feel extremely painful, lonely, or at least a pain in the butt, but it is all created by you, for you. Even when it feels like it is all against you.
Experiencing ugliness allows you to appreciate beauty, hunger allows you to enjoy food. When we stay in the ugliness or the hunger because of our minds, we postpone the beautiful food that can be in our midst. When we are no longer condemning the ugliness, we can access the beauty in everything.
And, yes, there are many people in the world that experience daily horror and terror, hunger and violation. I would often focus on how horrible it all was and be stymied about what to do. I would be overwhelmed by the problem and be closed off to the solutions. But in those experiences as well, there is an opportunity for the world to see the 10,000 solutions that exist right now.
There is enough food in the world to feed the world. There are projects that assist families in wellness, as well as, emotional and financial ways. Local communities are shifting their awareness of how members, particularly women and girls, are treated. Little by little, folks are becoming aware of the myriad of solutions regarding economic scarcity. Does there need to be more of this? Absolutely! Join in!
We are in fact joined together in mutual liberation in these experiences. It is not about being in denial, it is exactly the opposite. It is stating what is without drama or judgment. It is about awareness that we have all that is necessary for our joy.
When we focus on the opportunity- instead of the "problem"- we gain access to the possibilities, the solutions, and we all expand and evolve together.
How do you experience the challenges of your life? Are they problems with no solutions? Are you overwhelmed and frightened or inspired to see how it all unfolds? Can you see the 10,000 solutions?
I immediately thought that she had started to read the Tao Te Ching or was channeling Lao-Tzu.
She explained further about what she meant. To paraphrase, the story would be that someone would be just living their life and get something really cool (like an ice cream cone) and be thrilled.
I agreed that, yes, that would be "super cool".
And maybe, that's how it can be, if we allow ourselves to see it that way.
Perhaps our lives can be without problems and 10,000 solutions. In other words, we can see life's challenges as just that- not problems or dramas, but challenges and opportunities to view the unlimited solutions that are available if we can get out of "problem mode" and into "solution mode".
I know it can be a challenge, at times, to see what is happening in your life as an opportunity. In fact, in the moment, it may feel extremely painful, lonely, or at least a pain in the butt, but it is all created by you, for you. Even when it feels like it is all against you.
Experiencing ugliness allows you to appreciate beauty, hunger allows you to enjoy food. When we stay in the ugliness or the hunger because of our minds, we postpone the beautiful food that can be in our midst. When we are no longer condemning the ugliness, we can access the beauty in everything.
And, yes, there are many people in the world that experience daily horror and terror, hunger and violation. I would often focus on how horrible it all was and be stymied about what to do. I would be overwhelmed by the problem and be closed off to the solutions. But in those experiences as well, there is an opportunity for the world to see the 10,000 solutions that exist right now.
There is enough food in the world to feed the world. There are projects that assist families in wellness, as well as, emotional and financial ways. Local communities are shifting their awareness of how members, particularly women and girls, are treated. Little by little, folks are becoming aware of the myriad of solutions regarding economic scarcity. Does there need to be more of this? Absolutely! Join in!
We are in fact joined together in mutual liberation in these experiences. It is not about being in denial, it is exactly the opposite. It is stating what is without drama or judgment. It is about awareness that we have all that is necessary for our joy.
When we focus on the opportunity- instead of the "problem"- we gain access to the possibilities, the solutions, and we all expand and evolve together.
How do you experience the challenges of your life? Are they problems with no solutions? Are you overwhelmed and frightened or inspired to see how it all unfolds? Can you see the 10,000 solutions?
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Appreciation and Letting Go to Manifest Your Desires
On Saturday morning, the piano from my childhood, where I learned "Chop Sticks" and Mozart, was delivered to my home. It had spent many years at my brother's home where my nieces had learned how to play and now they were off to college and careers.
Having the piano here was something I had desired for a while, but moving it here seemed complicated to me. It seemed more expensive to move than it was worth.
Then, when my eldest daughter expressed a desire to learn the instrument, my husband suggested we finally pluck it from my brother's house. There was a guy who did moving at my husband's work who was willing to do it for a favor and we made plans.
Great, not complicated!
On Saturday morning, when my husband and the team of men arrived, he immediately came up to the front door to deliver some "bad" news before I noticed. "It got damaged."
Perhaps it is not as uncomplicated as it seemed.
"Oh.." I thought. Let's see. They got the piano inside and it looks like it really needed a chiropractor. Its back was uneven, as if it was twisted.
The moving guys were really mortified and when I mentioned that the piano was from my childhood years, they felt even worse.
Apparently, it fell in the truck.
After they left and I studied the keys (some were inaudible and other stuck) I immediately went into blame mode. "Why did I let guys, with no piano moving experience, move a piano?" "How could it have fallen?" "Why didn't I just pay some more money and get insured movers?"
I realized with time that I was not OK with this situation. My husband told me to start calling piano repair people. I was trying to avoid complications, and yet here I was, in a situation that was getting more complicated. "Trying to avoid" anything usually brings to the fore, right?
I got appointments with two repair men to give estimates of repairing the damage. The first one arrived on Wednesday morning and looked the instrument over. "I would condemn it" he said. It would take at least $1000 to repair plus moving costs. The piano was worth only about $400. "It's totaled." "I've never seen this type of damage before" he added.
After he left I emailed my husband with the sad news and decided to cancel the 2nd repair estimate. Then I went upstairs and looked for consolation in my latest Wayne Dyer read Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life which is about the 81 verses of the Tao Te Ching. The verse it opened on was about letting go of attachments.
Yes, I was really attached. I was attached to a $400 upright Hammond piano. I was attached to my fond memories of making music on this piano and then hearing my daughters do the same. I was attached to the sounds of a piano in my home. It had been out of my life for more than 20 years and then back for 4 days and I was really attached.
Then I opened another book at a random page and it talked about how temporary everything is. "This, too, shall pass", a phrase my mother repeated many times in my childhood, was sitting on this page for me to see. My favorite part, which was also in the Wayne Dyer book, was that in a seemingly terrible ending is a beginning.
I clung to that one. What's the beginning here? What beginning can the end of this piano bring to me? And then, I decided that all I can do now is be sad. Allow the sadness to come and not try to change it.
The rest of the day, more or less, I was sad. I was grieving the end of my days and my kids' days of music with this piano.
My husband encouraged me to have the 2nd repairman (Richard Ziss) see the piano after all. I was hesitant to waste his time, but left a second message to have him come anyway.
He arrived and looked at the piano the same way the 1st man did. Taking off exterior pieces of the piano cabinet and explaining the damage. Then he got out a mallet, raised the piano off the ground, and using another piece of wood to protect the piano, he began to bang the piano cabinet. I left the room. It was like watching a doctor continue to try to perform CPR to a lifeless body.
The pounding stopped and I returned to the room. "Well, it's back in place." He said matter-of-factly. He ran his fingers up the keyboard. They sounded great! No stuck or inaudible keys.
"Oh, my God! You did it!" I exclaimed.
"Yep."
"The other guy said it was condemned...."
"I've heard that before. Sometimes, these old pianos just need some adjusting..."
I couldn't believe it. I had said good-bye to this poor twisted instrument that I hadn't really appreciated until I learned that it was leaving, and now someone just made it so it can stay.
He explained what other repairs needed to be done to protect from future problems and made an appointment to return next week to finish up. He charged me just a couple hundred dollars for all the repairs and tuning. Money gladly spent.
I realized that there was a lot to learn here. The biggest lesson for me was that appreciation can create miracles. Through the damage sustained in moving the piano, I appreciated the music we created with the piano. Through the potential loss of the piano, I appreciated the instrument itself and all the joy it brought me in childhood and now. Through the process of getting another opinion, I appreciated the repairman who fixed it (and the one who could not) and my husband. I also appreciated hearing and watching my kids enjoy the piano. You can find out more about appreciation creating miracles through the Abundance Course.
The second lesson was that letting go is so important in manifesting. I had to let go when the piano was damaged, when I got the news of it being "condemned", and in being sad. Then I had to let go of the prognosis that I was sure was final and see what Richard had to say.
Here's the experiment: What are you holding on to that could be holding back a dream? What could you be appreciating that can help you in allowing your dream to come to fruition? Are you feeling like it is just not possible? That's OK. Allow yourself to grieve your attachment to your dream and know it is an ending that brings a beginning. Then let it all go and appreciate the opportunity to acknowledge the attachment. Letting go of the attachment is what makes you free. That's what makes it not matter whether it all happens or not. And when you appreciate what you have and let go of what you desire, it allows for miracles. Either way, you are whole.
Need a piano repaired or tuned? Gotta call my "Miracle Piano Man" Richard Ziss: 973 325-5052 or pianoman07059@aol.com
Having the piano here was something I had desired for a while, but moving it here seemed complicated to me. It seemed more expensive to move than it was worth.
Then, when my eldest daughter expressed a desire to learn the instrument, my husband suggested we finally pluck it from my brother's house. There was a guy who did moving at my husband's work who was willing to do it for a favor and we made plans.
Great, not complicated!
On Saturday morning, when my husband and the team of men arrived, he immediately came up to the front door to deliver some "bad" news before I noticed. "It got damaged."
Perhaps it is not as uncomplicated as it seemed.
"Oh.." I thought. Let's see. They got the piano inside and it looks like it really needed a chiropractor. Its back was uneven, as if it was twisted.
The moving guys were really mortified and when I mentioned that the piano was from my childhood years, they felt even worse.
Apparently, it fell in the truck.
After they left and I studied the keys (some were inaudible and other stuck) I immediately went into blame mode. "Why did I let guys, with no piano moving experience, move a piano?" "How could it have fallen?" "Why didn't I just pay some more money and get insured movers?"
I realized with time that I was not OK with this situation. My husband told me to start calling piano repair people. I was trying to avoid complications, and yet here I was, in a situation that was getting more complicated. "Trying to avoid" anything usually brings to the fore, right?
I got appointments with two repair men to give estimates of repairing the damage. The first one arrived on Wednesday morning and looked the instrument over. "I would condemn it" he said. It would take at least $1000 to repair plus moving costs. The piano was worth only about $400. "It's totaled." "I've never seen this type of damage before" he added.
After he left I emailed my husband with the sad news and decided to cancel the 2nd repair estimate. Then I went upstairs and looked for consolation in my latest Wayne Dyer read Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life which is about the 81 verses of the Tao Te Ching. The verse it opened on was about letting go of attachments.
Yes, I was really attached. I was attached to a $400 upright Hammond piano. I was attached to my fond memories of making music on this piano and then hearing my daughters do the same. I was attached to the sounds of a piano in my home. It had been out of my life for more than 20 years and then back for 4 days and I was really attached.
Then I opened another book at a random page and it talked about how temporary everything is. "This, too, shall pass", a phrase my mother repeated many times in my childhood, was sitting on this page for me to see. My favorite part, which was also in the Wayne Dyer book, was that in a seemingly terrible ending is a beginning.
I clung to that one. What's the beginning here? What beginning can the end of this piano bring to me? And then, I decided that all I can do now is be sad. Allow the sadness to come and not try to change it.
The rest of the day, more or less, I was sad. I was grieving the end of my days and my kids' days of music with this piano.
My husband encouraged me to have the 2nd repairman (Richard Ziss) see the piano after all. I was hesitant to waste his time, but left a second message to have him come anyway.
He arrived and looked at the piano the same way the 1st man did. Taking off exterior pieces of the piano cabinet and explaining the damage. Then he got out a mallet, raised the piano off the ground, and using another piece of wood to protect the piano, he began to bang the piano cabinet. I left the room. It was like watching a doctor continue to try to perform CPR to a lifeless body.
The pounding stopped and I returned to the room. "Well, it's back in place." He said matter-of-factly. He ran his fingers up the keyboard. They sounded great! No stuck or inaudible keys.
"Oh, my God! You did it!" I exclaimed.
"Yep."
"The other guy said it was condemned...."
"I've heard that before. Sometimes, these old pianos just need some adjusting..."
I couldn't believe it. I had said good-bye to this poor twisted instrument that I hadn't really appreciated until I learned that it was leaving, and now someone just made it so it can stay.
He explained what other repairs needed to be done to protect from future problems and made an appointment to return next week to finish up. He charged me just a couple hundred dollars for all the repairs and tuning. Money gladly spent.
I realized that there was a lot to learn here. The biggest lesson for me was that appreciation can create miracles. Through the damage sustained in moving the piano, I appreciated the music we created with the piano. Through the potential loss of the piano, I appreciated the instrument itself and all the joy it brought me in childhood and now. Through the process of getting another opinion, I appreciated the repairman who fixed it (and the one who could not) and my husband. I also appreciated hearing and watching my kids enjoy the piano. You can find out more about appreciation creating miracles through the Abundance Course.
The second lesson was that letting go is so important in manifesting. I had to let go when the piano was damaged, when I got the news of it being "condemned", and in being sad. Then I had to let go of the prognosis that I was sure was final and see what Richard had to say.
Here's the experiment: What are you holding on to that could be holding back a dream? What could you be appreciating that can help you in allowing your dream to come to fruition? Are you feeling like it is just not possible? That's OK. Allow yourself to grieve your attachment to your dream and know it is an ending that brings a beginning. Then let it all go and appreciate the opportunity to acknowledge the attachment. Letting go of the attachment is what makes you free. That's what makes it not matter whether it all happens or not. And when you appreciate what you have and let go of what you desire, it allows for miracles. Either way, you are whole.
Need a piano repaired or tuned? Gotta call my "Miracle Piano Man" Richard Ziss: 973 325-5052 or pianoman07059@aol.com
Monday, July 27, 2009
Daring to Be Happy
I got a recommendation from a good friend to see a movie called Happy Go Lucky. It's an interesting film about a British primary school teacher who is almost always happy. The beginning credits show her riding her bike through the streets of London, enjoying the ride, relaxed and...happy.
For me, the most striking aspect of the film was how people reacted to this young kind woman. Some of the characters were is various states of pain and sadness and either ignored her, berated her, or blamed her for their misery.
It stayed with me because this was my excuse for not being happy. It was my fear. I might offend someone. I might threaten someone. I might remind someone that they don't feel good and they'd take it out on me. I might be betraying some unspoken agreement for both of us to stay unhappy and unfulfilled.
It was not until I was really sick of being unhappy that I was willing to risk the consequences of being happy. I was willing to let go of the fear of change and experiment with being happy. I was willing to let go of relationships that could not survive the change. I was daring to be happy.
That's what happens with this woman in the film. You never see her blame the other person. She has empathy and compassion for the pain of the other person, but she does not allow it to deter her from her own happiness. In some cases, she has to let go of relationships.
What's stopping you from being happy (or passionate or abundant or loving)? What are you afraid will happen? Who might be affected by this change? Will you be breaking an agreement with someone?
Now that you have those answers, are you ready to let go and see what happens if you allow yourself to be happy? Can you let go of caring about what others think about you and dare to be happy?
Do this experiment for a week and let me know what happens!
For me, the most striking aspect of the film was how people reacted to this young kind woman. Some of the characters were is various states of pain and sadness and either ignored her, berated her, or blamed her for their misery.
It stayed with me because this was my excuse for not being happy. It was my fear. I might offend someone. I might threaten someone. I might remind someone that they don't feel good and they'd take it out on me. I might be betraying some unspoken agreement for both of us to stay unhappy and unfulfilled.
It was not until I was really sick of being unhappy that I was willing to risk the consequences of being happy. I was willing to let go of the fear of change and experiment with being happy. I was willing to let go of relationships that could not survive the change. I was daring to be happy.
That's what happens with this woman in the film. You never see her blame the other person. She has empathy and compassion for the pain of the other person, but she does not allow it to deter her from her own happiness. In some cases, she has to let go of relationships.
What's stopping you from being happy (or passionate or abundant or loving)? What are you afraid will happen? Who might be affected by this change? Will you be breaking an agreement with someone?
Now that you have those answers, are you ready to let go and see what happens if you allow yourself to be happy? Can you let go of caring about what others think about you and dare to be happy?
Do this experiment for a week and let me know what happens!
Friday, July 24, 2009
Is Boredom the Ego?
I was sitting at the computer recently and found myself feeling bored. This is hard to imagine if you knew that I'm a mother of three young children and running a business out of my house. But, there are times when there is not much to do. In fact, I have purposely made it so. I could be cleaning something or writing something (like a blog post?) or "fixing something". Still, everyone seemed to be accounted for in the family and I didn't have the desire to do any of the above.
The first impulse was to call or IM someone, but suddenly I realized that it was covering up the feeling and I wanted to see why I felt that way. Boredom, to me, feels like restlessness. Uninspired, low energy that is not easily remedied. There is an underlying anxiety to it.
"What should I do now?" "How do I make this moment move more quickly so I can get back into the action that I call 'my life'?" There were definite plans for later in the day, but none right now. How could I be bored? This gap in a busy schedule rarely happens, but when it does, it feels...not so good.
Here's the big question: Is this boredom I am feeling just the ego? Is it just a story that the ego has spun out of control? Have I totally forgotten that I am part of the Everything, the I Am that I Am?
The story is that I have this moment. The spin is that this moment is boring- not fulfilling and must be filled up with stuff to feel better. Yeah, pretty much sounds like the ego to me!
I decided to just look at one of my favorite things in the world, a tree. I don't know why I love trees so much exactly, but I do. They are still and strong and beautiful and I always start to remember, or at least remember that I have forgotten, who I am.
I looked at the tree for just a moment and breathed and felt the feeling. Feeling less bored, more in the moment. Looked a litte longer. Feeling less restless, more peaceful.
I stopped feeling the urge to fix and do and cover the boredom up with "being productive". I stopped feeling like I needed to speed through the moment so I could act out my plans and "do my life".
Here's an experiment: Next time you are feeling bored or restless or anxious or you don't know what, ask yourself some questions. What are you feeling? What story have you created to justify this feeling? What if you did not try to get through the moment so you could stop feeling that way, but just stayed in the moment and remembered that this is a feeling?
Perhaps look at a tree or a flower or your kids playing and remember that this feeling is not you, it is a story the ego is spinning. Then that gives you some space to remember who you really are- you are the peace that you are craving, the love you desire.
Let me know what happens!
The first impulse was to call or IM someone, but suddenly I realized that it was covering up the feeling and I wanted to see why I felt that way. Boredom, to me, feels like restlessness. Uninspired, low energy that is not easily remedied. There is an underlying anxiety to it.
"What should I do now?" "How do I make this moment move more quickly so I can get back into the action that I call 'my life'?" There were definite plans for later in the day, but none right now. How could I be bored? This gap in a busy schedule rarely happens, but when it does, it feels...not so good.
Here's the big question: Is this boredom I am feeling just the ego? Is it just a story that the ego has spun out of control? Have I totally forgotten that I am part of the Everything, the I Am that I Am?
The story is that I have this moment. The spin is that this moment is boring- not fulfilling and must be filled up with stuff to feel better. Yeah, pretty much sounds like the ego to me!
I decided to just look at one of my favorite things in the world, a tree. I don't know why I love trees so much exactly, but I do. They are still and strong and beautiful and I always start to remember, or at least remember that I have forgotten, who I am.
I looked at the tree for just a moment and breathed and felt the feeling. Feeling less bored, more in the moment. Looked a litte longer. Feeling less restless, more peaceful.
I stopped feeling the urge to fix and do and cover the boredom up with "being productive". I stopped feeling like I needed to speed through the moment so I could act out my plans and "do my life".
Here's an experiment: Next time you are feeling bored or restless or anxious or you don't know what, ask yourself some questions. What are you feeling? What story have you created to justify this feeling? What if you did not try to get through the moment so you could stop feeling that way, but just stayed in the moment and remembered that this is a feeling?
Perhaps look at a tree or a flower or your kids playing and remember that this feeling is not you, it is a story the ego is spinning. Then that gives you some space to remember who you really are- you are the peace that you are craving, the love you desire.
Let me know what happens!
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Manifesting From the Heart
Yesterday, my husband drove in our new Toyota Prius hybrid car. I was thrilled. The kids were excited to meet our new family member "Priscilla Prius" (our mini-van was named "Sienna" since it was a Toyota Sienna).
I had manifested this car from my heart.
Huh?
Let me clarify.
Several years ago, before children and suburban living, we were car-less and loved it. Living in NYC didn't require a car and if we did need one, we'd rent a zipcar.
Then after our first child was born and we decided to live in a place that did not require climbing 5 flights of stairs, we bought a VW Passat, my husband's desired car. I wanted a hybrid, but they were out of price range for us. In other words, I let the "how", that is, price, get into my psyche and before I knew it, I was riding in the VW.
It was great! It served us well, and my husband promised a hybrid as our next car.
Speed up 4 years later and we're selling the Passat....for a mini-van. What happened? I was pregnant with our third and our options for vehicles were narrowing as our size of family was widening. At least that was what I told myself as I looked around at the hundreds of mini-vans we saw around us. Once again, the "how" dominated the equation. We'd never be able to fit 3 kids in a Prius, right? The other hybrids were not as great as reported, so I'd wait.
Then, as I was dropping my younger daughter at an appointment, I noticed some friends in their Prius. " I'd love one of these, but with three kids, it doesn't work", I lamented. My friend asked me to check out the back seat. He had three carseats snuggly set, ready for their brood of twins and an older child.
I couldn't believe it. "How'd you do that?" I riddled him with questions. "How you'd get those carseats?" "When did you buy it?" "Do you like it?"
It was then that it hit me that having a hybrid was really within my grasp. We could fit our whole family in this car. The times when we have more than 5 people amounts to perhaps twice a year. We could rent an extra for those times.
The "hows" of this manifestation were cleared.
The "whys" were becoming more clear, as well. Having a hybrid would be in keeping with my values. It would be more environmentally sound and save money. It would be pro-active in breaking the country's addiction to oil and getting us out of compromising relationships with oil-rich countries. It short, this was a manifestation from the heart. It reflected my heart and what I wanted for my world.
Still, I wasn't sure it would pass with my husband. I floated the idea with no attachment to the result. At first he was doubtful and then by the next day he was looking a Consumer Reports. This is always a good sign.
Before I knew it he wanted me to pick out colors for interiors. Then he calculated that between trading in our van, getting a better loan, and saving on gas, we would be spending less on this car than the van. All good news!
And today, 5 weeks later, we have our new Prius, my heartfelt manifestation, in our garage. It's a beautiful sight.
In case I was not clear in this story, manifestation is influenced by "whys" and "hows". The "why"s usually help to expand your vision and inspire you to continue or not. Think about why you want something. Is it for the ego or for the heart? Does it make up for something you think you lack in your life or is it a confirmation of your highest self?
Now, for the "hows". "How"s tend to contract the vision. When you start trying to figure out the "how"s you usually get discouraged, overwhelmed and the manifestation dies out or is delayed. Let the Universe figure out the hows.
When I started to think about the hows of having the car, I got discouraged and then my thoughts and feelings stopped matching the desire for the car. They reflected that is was not possible. It delayed the manifestation for years.
Then, when it was revealed that this would work and not all the reasons how it couldn't, I had no reason for delay. It was a sign from the Universe to have faith in my desire and not worry about the "how"s. (I could have easily dismissed it as a unique situation that would not work for me.)
The trick with future manifestations is having that faith that the "hows" would work themselves out before it is revealed. That probably would have brought the car even earlier to me. (In truth, it was fine either way..)
I had manifested this car from my heart.
Huh?
Let me clarify.
Several years ago, before children and suburban living, we were car-less and loved it. Living in NYC didn't require a car and if we did need one, we'd rent a zipcar.
Then after our first child was born and we decided to live in a place that did not require climbing 5 flights of stairs, we bought a VW Passat, my husband's desired car. I wanted a hybrid, but they were out of price range for us. In other words, I let the "how", that is, price, get into my psyche and before I knew it, I was riding in the VW.
It was great! It served us well, and my husband promised a hybrid as our next car.
Speed up 4 years later and we're selling the Passat....for a mini-van. What happened? I was pregnant with our third and our options for vehicles were narrowing as our size of family was widening. At least that was what I told myself as I looked around at the hundreds of mini-vans we saw around us. Once again, the "how" dominated the equation. We'd never be able to fit 3 kids in a Prius, right? The other hybrids were not as great as reported, so I'd wait.
Then, as I was dropping my younger daughter at an appointment, I noticed some friends in their Prius. " I'd love one of these, but with three kids, it doesn't work", I lamented. My friend asked me to check out the back seat. He had three carseats snuggly set, ready for their brood of twins and an older child.
I couldn't believe it. "How'd you do that?" I riddled him with questions. "How you'd get those carseats?" "When did you buy it?" "Do you like it?"
It was then that it hit me that having a hybrid was really within my grasp. We could fit our whole family in this car. The times when we have more than 5 people amounts to perhaps twice a year. We could rent an extra for those times.
The "hows" of this manifestation were cleared.
The "whys" were becoming more clear, as well. Having a hybrid would be in keeping with my values. It would be more environmentally sound and save money. It would be pro-active in breaking the country's addiction to oil and getting us out of compromising relationships with oil-rich countries. It short, this was a manifestation from the heart. It reflected my heart and what I wanted for my world.
Still, I wasn't sure it would pass with my husband. I floated the idea with no attachment to the result. At first he was doubtful and then by the next day he was looking a Consumer Reports. This is always a good sign.
Before I knew it he wanted me to pick out colors for interiors. Then he calculated that between trading in our van, getting a better loan, and saving on gas, we would be spending less on this car than the van. All good news!
And today, 5 weeks later, we have our new Prius, my heartfelt manifestation, in our garage. It's a beautiful sight.
In case I was not clear in this story, manifestation is influenced by "whys" and "hows". The "why"s usually help to expand your vision and inspire you to continue or not. Think about why you want something. Is it for the ego or for the heart? Does it make up for something you think you lack in your life or is it a confirmation of your highest self?
Now, for the "hows". "How"s tend to contract the vision. When you start trying to figure out the "how"s you usually get discouraged, overwhelmed and the manifestation dies out or is delayed. Let the Universe figure out the hows.
When I started to think about the hows of having the car, I got discouraged and then my thoughts and feelings stopped matching the desire for the car. They reflected that is was not possible. It delayed the manifestation for years.
Then, when it was revealed that this would work and not all the reasons how it couldn't, I had no reason for delay. It was a sign from the Universe to have faith in my desire and not worry about the "how"s. (I could have easily dismissed it as a unique situation that would not work for me.)
The trick with future manifestations is having that faith that the "hows" would work themselves out before it is revealed. That probably would have brought the car even earlier to me. (In truth, it was fine either way..)
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Just Be Present
If I bothered to look at past posts I would most likely see quotes from the animated film Kung-Fu Panda, but at risk of being repetitive, I want to write this one again.
It's that important.
Here it is: "The past is a mystery. Tomorrow is history. But, today is a gift....that's why they called it 'the present'." The kung-fu sage turtle says this to Po, the chubby, dumpling-loving, kung-fu master hopeful.
Gotta love it. Don't worry about the past, don't concern yourself with the future. Just Be Present. And I will add to that. When you are present, you are your present (or gift) to the world.
I get asked fairly often about why we are here in the world. What is our mission? How do you know if you are on the right path?
If you are in the here and now, you are on the right path. If you are present to yourself and others, you are fulfilling your mission.
What? Come on. That's not practical. There must be something I need to do, right? Specifically, what do I do? This is often the response.
I totally get this. I've asked the same questions and on occasion, I have the same doubts about the simplicity of this statement. And, I always come back to the same conclusion.
When I am present, I am not resistant to what is. When I am accepting of what is, I can see all the options out there for me. When I am present, I am clear and if action is necessary, I can take clear, effective action in the direction that feels best. How do I know if feels best? I am present. I am at peace.
How do you become present? Get still and quiet. Sometimes I close my eyes and just listen to my breathing. Sometimes and I sit and look at a tree and feel its stillness. (Trees awaken us to our stillness. Gotta love 'em!) Sometimes I watch my children laugh and play and see their presence in what they are attending to. Children are very present. I become aware if my mind is focusing on the past or future instead of enjoying what's happening right now.
Give it your attention and see what gifts the present reveals to you.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Befriending the Moment
I've been re-reading A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. (I highly recommend it, if you haven't already picked up a copy.) It's been a year or so since my last reading and it always surprises me how much I rediscover from a book like this.
This makes sense considering how much I've changed since the last reading. I've grown and stretched and fallen and gotten up again. I've slowed down and sped up and slowed down again.
One passage that got my attention, although it was one of many, was about what our relationship is with the Now, this moment. How are we treating this moment? Tolle puts out four possibilities for how we treat the Now: as a friend, as an obstacle, as a means to an end, or as an enemy.
It stopped me in my tracks. I thought about how many times in the day that I rush through activities because I want to get to the end. How I treat much of my time in overcoming perceived obstacles. That there are even times when I feel as if the moment is against me.
Then I realized why I've had this urge for the past month to just slow down. It is precisely to look at this most important relationship. To make give myself the space to make friends. To break the pattern of doing, once again, and relax into "being".
It never fails to be fruitful without me trying to make it that. It always is surprisingly effortless and abundant. It never ceases to be peaceful when I let go of all the cookey and seemingly rational reasons to keep going the way I've been and just "be" and let "it" be as it is.
If you dare to reflect upon how you relate to your world, consider this question: How's life treating you? How are you treating life and, most importantly, this moment? Are you friends with the Now or are you making it something else? Let me know what comes up for you...
This makes sense considering how much I've changed since the last reading. I've grown and stretched and fallen and gotten up again. I've slowed down and sped up and slowed down again.
One passage that got my attention, although it was one of many, was about what our relationship is with the Now, this moment. How are we treating this moment? Tolle puts out four possibilities for how we treat the Now: as a friend, as an obstacle, as a means to an end, or as an enemy.
It stopped me in my tracks. I thought about how many times in the day that I rush through activities because I want to get to the end. How I treat much of my time in overcoming perceived obstacles. That there are even times when I feel as if the moment is against me.
Then I realized why I've had this urge for the past month to just slow down. It is precisely to look at this most important relationship. To make give myself the space to make friends. To break the pattern of doing, once again, and relax into "being".
It never fails to be fruitful without me trying to make it that. It always is surprisingly effortless and abundant. It never ceases to be peaceful when I let go of all the cookey and seemingly rational reasons to keep going the way I've been and just "be" and let "it" be as it is.
If you dare to reflect upon how you relate to your world, consider this question: How's life treating you? How are you treating life and, most importantly, this moment? Are you friends with the Now or are you making it something else? Let me know what comes up for you...
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
How a 5 year old uses the Law of Attraction!
So, we just, I mean, just finished cleaning up after my daughter's 5 th birthday party. It was a big kiddie party for us. About 20 kids, lots of cupcakes, running around, jewelry making, and conversation. The weather totally came through and we had just enough sun and then the rains came after the last kid departed.
For me, the most amazing stuff happened way before the party. For the past few weeks, I have witnessed my daughter totally in flow with the Law of Attraction. Using it to manifest exactly what she wanted for her party, her gifts, her experience. She has really inspired me with her innate ability (we are all born to do this!) to have desires, feel good about them, draw and write about them, put them up to look at them, be grateful for them and then, let it all go knowing that it will all come to her.
I watched her, day after day, week after week, tell me what she wanted for her birthday, draw picture after picture, label all the pictures with her best "bubble letters", put her pictures on the wall. She even drew herself accepting gifts and then wearing the gifts.
I loved watching her get excited about the idea of getting and enjoying these items. But, what really blew me away was her faith that it was all coming and that she'd be fine no matter what.
I asked her what she was grateful for and immediately she started naming these gifts about which she has been wishing to possess. I asked her how she could be grateful since she has not received them. "But, I will get them, Mom" she replied matter-of-factly. And then her sister chimed in, "And if you don't get them for your birthday, you'll get them at Christmas, right?" My daughter nodded, as if to say, "Mom, that's the way it works. Don' t you know?"
Wow! I was blown away by how strong this knowing is. The knowing that we are born to be happy and joyful. The knowing that we can have faith that our desires will be manifested sooner or later and so we can relax and be at peace. That we can be grateful before we receive knowing that it will happen, if we believe.
At the party today, she received 4 of the 6 or 7 items on her list. She was thrilled. There was no disappointment that things were not exactly matched. She was also equally thrilled by the gifts that were not on her list. She kept saying "This was the best birthday party I ever had!" all through the morning.
I thank my daughter for showing me and reminding me how it's done. Know your desires, write them down, visualize them, put them up on the wall to remind you, have faith in their eventual appearance, and let go. 'Cause it's really not about the stuff, it's about the wisdom that we are abundant, have the power to call forth what we desire, and that, no matter what, we are Divinely complete and whole.
For me, the most amazing stuff happened way before the party. For the past few weeks, I have witnessed my daughter totally in flow with the Law of Attraction. Using it to manifest exactly what she wanted for her party, her gifts, her experience. She has really inspired me with her innate ability (we are all born to do this!) to have desires, feel good about them, draw and write about them, put them up to look at them, be grateful for them and then, let it all go knowing that it will all come to her.
I watched her, day after day, week after week, tell me what she wanted for her birthday, draw picture after picture, label all the pictures with her best "bubble letters", put her pictures on the wall. She even drew herself accepting gifts and then wearing the gifts.
I loved watching her get excited about the idea of getting and enjoying these items. But, what really blew me away was her faith that it was all coming and that she'd be fine no matter what.
I asked her what she was grateful for and immediately she started naming these gifts about which she has been wishing to possess. I asked her how she could be grateful since she has not received them. "But, I will get them, Mom" she replied matter-of-factly. And then her sister chimed in, "And if you don't get them for your birthday, you'll get them at Christmas, right?" My daughter nodded, as if to say, "Mom, that's the way it works. Don' t you know?"
Wow! I was blown away by how strong this knowing is. The knowing that we are born to be happy and joyful. The knowing that we can have faith that our desires will be manifested sooner or later and so we can relax and be at peace. That we can be grateful before we receive knowing that it will happen, if we believe.
At the party today, she received 4 of the 6 or 7 items on her list. She was thrilled. There was no disappointment that things were not exactly matched. She was also equally thrilled by the gifts that were not on her list. She kept saying "This was the best birthday party I ever had!" all through the morning.
I thank my daughter for showing me and reminding me how it's done. Know your desires, write them down, visualize them, put them up on the wall to remind you, have faith in their eventual appearance, and let go. 'Cause it's really not about the stuff, it's about the wisdom that we are abundant, have the power to call forth what we desire, and that, no matter what, we are Divinely complete and whole.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Celebrate Before the Party
I had planned a while ago to have a book signing party for my new book. I wanted to announce the book to the world, thank people who had helped, and take note of my accomplishment. This was all good.
Still, I felt that I wanted to celebrate in a more personal way apart from the party. I wanted to celebrate with myself that I had not only written a book, but had grown so much in the process. I had changed and stretched. I had gone out of my comfort zone quite a bit. I had faced limiting beliefs and revised them.
I have been seeing a healer for a few months and when I presented this dilemma of how to celebrate before the party, she had a recommendation.
She led me through some guided imagery where I watched my process of creating this book from the beginning. Then when I had the book in my hand, the manifestation of my desires, I was to celebrate.
I ended up with a few close friends in my backyard just talking in this scene. Then she had me congratulate myself. In this guided imagery, I was hugging myself. I was whispering messages of love and congratulations to myself. I was affirming myself.
It was very intense.
After the imagery was done. I felt complete. I felt that I had done the real celebration already.
Now I could have the party with no other expectation of just having fun and feel at peace. It did not have to fill any requirement for me.
And that is exactly what happened. I felt really relaxed, at peace, and abundant. Guests arrived with great energy feeling the same way. There was a lot of mingling and signing of books. There were at least 20 children at the party and everyone got along well.
So, here's something to consider: The next time you feel you need to get something from an experience, see if you can give it to yourself first. If you need some love, give it to yourself first. If you need encouragement, give it to yourself first. Imagine that you are sitting with yourself and telling yourself the message that you feel you need from others. Embrace yourself. Love yourself. Let me know what happens....
Still, I felt that I wanted to celebrate in a more personal way apart from the party. I wanted to celebrate with myself that I had not only written a book, but had grown so much in the process. I had changed and stretched. I had gone out of my comfort zone quite a bit. I had faced limiting beliefs and revised them.
I have been seeing a healer for a few months and when I presented this dilemma of how to celebrate before the party, she had a recommendation.
She led me through some guided imagery where I watched my process of creating this book from the beginning. Then when I had the book in my hand, the manifestation of my desires, I was to celebrate.
I ended up with a few close friends in my backyard just talking in this scene. Then she had me congratulate myself. In this guided imagery, I was hugging myself. I was whispering messages of love and congratulations to myself. I was affirming myself.
It was very intense.
After the imagery was done. I felt complete. I felt that I had done the real celebration already.
Now I could have the party with no other expectation of just having fun and feel at peace. It did not have to fill any requirement for me.
And that is exactly what happened. I felt really relaxed, at peace, and abundant. Guests arrived with great energy feeling the same way. There was a lot of mingling and signing of books. There were at least 20 children at the party and everyone got along well.
So, here's something to consider: The next time you feel you need to get something from an experience, see if you can give it to yourself first. If you need some love, give it to yourself first. If you need encouragement, give it to yourself first. Imagine that you are sitting with yourself and telling yourself the message that you feel you need from others. Embrace yourself. Love yourself. Let me know what happens....
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
A Dream Come True
Well, it's been a while since I last sat down to write a post. A lot has happened. I have received my book at last! Five hundred copies have been sitting in my dining room awaiting homes. I have enjoyed looking at all of them. Small and beautiful and powerful.
I took some time to reflect upon what has transpired over the last few months. The decision to write a book, selecting a topic, outlining and brainstorming, writing, editing, and rewriting, worrying, relaxing, have doubt and then faith in the process, facing challenges of technology and victories with uploading, tearing up seeing the cover for the first time and then finally, in print, has been a rewarding journey to say the least.
Now, I am marketing and selling books. It is amazing to me that I have gotten so far in this process that many years ago I thought was not possible. It is amazing to me how many people went out of their way to help me. I had help with editing, proofing, and listening for flow. I had support regularly to listen to my progress and when I was stuck. I had support with putting up my site that would feature the book. I've had support with selling and promoting my book.
My dream was strong, I believed I could do it and with that vision and belief, I attracted many others that would help me along the way. Today, my husband's cousin came to visit from Mexico. He's a talented photographer. He bought my book with enthusiasm and shot photos of me for future projects. I felt like Oprah Winfrey. Why? I am surrounded by people who are attracted to my dream and want to be part of it. How sweet is that?!
So I tell you this story because it never ceases to amaze me how you will be supported by the Universe if you desire, believe, take right action, and keep going. I tell you this story to inspire you to reflect on your dreams, believe in them, to act upon them, and to keep going.
Do you have a dream? Can you imagine it happening, even a little? Can you take any steps, even baby steps, in that direction? That's all you have to do. That, and keep going...you'll be amazed what happens and who shows up.
Curious about the book? Check it out at http://www.extraordinaryabundance.com
I took some time to reflect upon what has transpired over the last few months. The decision to write a book, selecting a topic, outlining and brainstorming, writing, editing, and rewriting, worrying, relaxing, have doubt and then faith in the process, facing challenges of technology and victories with uploading, tearing up seeing the cover for the first time and then finally, in print, has been a rewarding journey to say the least.
Now, I am marketing and selling books. It is amazing to me that I have gotten so far in this process that many years ago I thought was not possible. It is amazing to me how many people went out of their way to help me. I had help with editing, proofing, and listening for flow. I had support regularly to listen to my progress and when I was stuck. I had support with putting up my site that would feature the book. I've had support with selling and promoting my book.
My dream was strong, I believed I could do it and with that vision and belief, I attracted many others that would help me along the way. Today, my husband's cousin came to visit from Mexico. He's a talented photographer. He bought my book with enthusiasm and shot photos of me for future projects. I felt like Oprah Winfrey. Why? I am surrounded by people who are attracted to my dream and want to be part of it. How sweet is that?!
So I tell you this story because it never ceases to amaze me how you will be supported by the Universe if you desire, believe, take right action, and keep going. I tell you this story to inspire you to reflect on your dreams, believe in them, to act upon them, and to keep going.
Do you have a dream? Can you imagine it happening, even a little? Can you take any steps, even baby steps, in that direction? That's all you have to do. That, and keep going...you'll be amazed what happens and who shows up.
Curious about the book? Check it out at http://www.extraordinaryabundance.com
Sunday, April 26, 2009
More than $10 Shoes
The other week I heard about a kid's shoe sale in Maplewood, NJ- close to our home. The store, Tic-Tac-Toe, carrying high-quality children's shoes which usually sell for at least $40 each, was selling their old stock for $10 a pair. I decided to check it out, knowing that my 3 kids need shoes and sandals for the upcoming spring and summer.
I got there early, just as they were opening, expecting the hoards to arrive. The owner, a lovely man, took his time helping me find what I needed, going through the piles of boxes under this year's styles. He picked out what he thought seemed the best and greatest deals. Shortly, more and more folks arrived with kids in tow. He greeted them, but did not abandon me to deal with all these other customers. He even went in the back to find more shoes for me.
I asked him what inspired him to have this sale- especially since it had gone on for at least a week before I made the pilgrimage. He said that he wanted to give back to the community and that he wanted people to come out and see eachother and talk. He felt his duty to stimulate the economy.
I was impressed by his generosity, his courage, and his care. It is another sign of what the possibilities are in this time in our economy. We can focus on what we are losing or what we are gaining. We can focus on all the problems or what creative solutions we can imagine. We can panic and hoard our stuff or we can give more to others and in that generosity realize how much we have to give.
When we are focused on winning and losing, we are in our head. We are limited in our sight. We are not seeing the infinite possibilities. When we are not concerned with what we win or lose, we are heart-centered. We are seeing more and more of what is possible. We are expansive. We are who we are meant to be.
So, I thank this man from Tic-Tac-Toe. I thank him for reminding me why I'm here, why we are all here. Not for the bottom-line and acquiring the large pile, but to feel the joy of ourselves and others, perhaps in the face of child with pink, sparkly sandals.
Which way have you been viewing this time in history? With dread and moments of panic or with inspired ideas of opportunity and hope? Are you hoarding or giving? Are you feeling grateful or are you complaining? What story do you want to tell yourself and others about what's going on? Leave a comment, if you'd like...
I got there early, just as they were opening, expecting the hoards to arrive. The owner, a lovely man, took his time helping me find what I needed, going through the piles of boxes under this year's styles. He picked out what he thought seemed the best and greatest deals. Shortly, more and more folks arrived with kids in tow. He greeted them, but did not abandon me to deal with all these other customers. He even went in the back to find more shoes for me.
I asked him what inspired him to have this sale- especially since it had gone on for at least a week before I made the pilgrimage. He said that he wanted to give back to the community and that he wanted people to come out and see eachother and talk. He felt his duty to stimulate the economy.
I was impressed by his generosity, his courage, and his care. It is another sign of what the possibilities are in this time in our economy. We can focus on what we are losing or what we are gaining. We can focus on all the problems or what creative solutions we can imagine. We can panic and hoard our stuff or we can give more to others and in that generosity realize how much we have to give.
When we are focused on winning and losing, we are in our head. We are limited in our sight. We are not seeing the infinite possibilities. When we are not concerned with what we win or lose, we are heart-centered. We are seeing more and more of what is possible. We are expansive. We are who we are meant to be.
So, I thank this man from Tic-Tac-Toe. I thank him for reminding me why I'm here, why we are all here. Not for the bottom-line and acquiring the large pile, but to feel the joy of ourselves and others, perhaps in the face of child with pink, sparkly sandals.
Which way have you been viewing this time in history? With dread and moments of panic or with inspired ideas of opportunity and hope? Are you hoarding or giving? Are you feeling grateful or are you complaining? What story do you want to tell yourself and others about what's going on? Leave a comment, if you'd like...
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Life on Wire
I saw Man on Wire this past weekend. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it. It is the true story of the famous high wire crossing between the North and South World Trade Center Towers in NYC by Phillipe Petitt. I remember it happening and hearing that the performer got arrested immediately afterward. As a child, I couldn't understand why they would arrest someone for doing such a miraculous, incredible act. My parents tried to explain that it was highly dangerous and someone could have gotten hurt or killed. My brain said "But, no one did get hurt and it was spectacular..."
As an adult watching this documentary and the six years of planning and replanning, and practicing, and traveling, and talking about Phillipe's dream, I gained a new focus about what's important about this event. It is a story about manifesting your dreams- even dreams that seem completely crazy and impossible. Even dreams that seem like they could kill you or destroy your life in some way if they do not work out the way you want.
Phillipe seems to have access to a part of himself that we all have, but most of us dare not go. His soul calls him and he must follow. He is obedient to his passions because he knows that following his dreams is the secret of living a full life. He follows even in the face of death and sees death in pursuit of his dreams as the only way to go.
He also inspired all the people he needed to make his dream come true. Those who helped him seemed to almost put their own lives on hold to plan with him. It was as if his soul was breathing life into theirs. They had little explanation for their devotion- some for the adventure, some for the inspiration, and others had no idea. Once again, when you have a strong enough belief for something, people appear to help you.
I started to think about my own life. Am I dreaming big enough? Am I living my life on wire? Am I doubting my course or am I strong in my belief? Am I afraid to take that step out beyond the safety zone or do I feel I must move forward with my dreams? I challenge you to ask these questions. I challenge you to watch Man on Wire and have it inspire you to step out a little at a time in between the buildings...
As an adult watching this documentary and the six years of planning and replanning, and practicing, and traveling, and talking about Phillipe's dream, I gained a new focus about what's important about this event. It is a story about manifesting your dreams- even dreams that seem completely crazy and impossible. Even dreams that seem like they could kill you or destroy your life in some way if they do not work out the way you want.
Phillipe seems to have access to a part of himself that we all have, but most of us dare not go. His soul calls him and he must follow. He is obedient to his passions because he knows that following his dreams is the secret of living a full life. He follows even in the face of death and sees death in pursuit of his dreams as the only way to go.
He also inspired all the people he needed to make his dream come true. Those who helped him seemed to almost put their own lives on hold to plan with him. It was as if his soul was breathing life into theirs. They had little explanation for their devotion- some for the adventure, some for the inspiration, and others had no idea. Once again, when you have a strong enough belief for something, people appear to help you.
I started to think about my own life. Am I dreaming big enough? Am I living my life on wire? Am I doubting my course or am I strong in my belief? Am I afraid to take that step out beyond the safety zone or do I feel I must move forward with my dreams? I challenge you to ask these questions. I challenge you to watch Man on Wire and have it inspire you to step out a little at a time in between the buildings...
Friday, March 27, 2009
Is Your Saboteur Showing Up?
Not so long ago, I had a run-in with my Saboteur. She's the part of you who seems to put obstacles to your dreams in your way. She's the one who can talk you out of anything.
This time, she was cleverly disguised as a loving, very rational friend who was looking out for me. And, in fact, she has that intention most of the time. However, she made it her duty to tell me all the horrible things that were to happen if I moved forward with a project that I had been dreaming about for some time. How did I know if it was going to turn out OK? I need to pull back, look at all my options, have my guard up.
It was difficult at first to figure out how much was her, just doing her thing, and how much was my inner wisdom guiding me to be cautious. So, I decided to ask some reasonable questions of the other people involved with this project and got some satisfactory answers. And then the next issue came into play. I stopped again, riddled with confusion, doubt, mistrust. I could have discussed this project and all the options with hundreds and even though it all sounded reasonable and logical, I would still be stymied and stuck.
That pattern of being stuck and confused and then OK for a little and then stuck and confused again led me to the conclusion that my Saboteur was showing up. She's there to stop me when I am process of manifesting my desires and this was a big one.
My coach then reminded me of all the great accomplishments that I have achieved as a result of working on this project. In fact, the most important part was complete. The rest was gravy. I thought about all the great success that I have enjoyed by allowing myself to feel the connection with my HigherSelf and how it has affected my work, my family, my friends, and this project. I started to appreciate all the things that I had learned. This appreciation helped to shift my thoughts and feelings. I realized that everything was clear and fine. My paralysis was about keeping the continued manifestation of this project away and no longer a wise sign of going slow.
I decided to have a little chat with my friend the Saboteur. She could be confident that I took her needs seriously and yet still go forward. I would take her hand and walk through the door with her. And when I made that decision, it was like an energy flood-gate was opened. Within a day I took two huge steps forward in this project. There was one piece that had a two week delay and so I blessed that delay and used it to review some details. The process was exciting and filled with "Yahoo!" and "I did it!" I celebrated each step. It felt great!
So, is your Saboteur showing up? Look for the signs: confusion, doubt, mistrust, fear, paralysis. Did you confirm things and still not feeling good about moving forward? Do you see the horror stories before you? Do you want something, but just can't take another step toward its manifestation? Perhaps it's time for a chat. A kind, gentle, but firm chat with your Saboteur. Yes, she has something to contribute and you will listen to her, but it will not stop you from moving toward your dream. Take her hand and take the next step.
This time, she was cleverly disguised as a loving, very rational friend who was looking out for me. And, in fact, she has that intention most of the time. However, she made it her duty to tell me all the horrible things that were to happen if I moved forward with a project that I had been dreaming about for some time. How did I know if it was going to turn out OK? I need to pull back, look at all my options, have my guard up.
It was difficult at first to figure out how much was her, just doing her thing, and how much was my inner wisdom guiding me to be cautious. So, I decided to ask some reasonable questions of the other people involved with this project and got some satisfactory answers. And then the next issue came into play. I stopped again, riddled with confusion, doubt, mistrust. I could have discussed this project and all the options with hundreds and even though it all sounded reasonable and logical, I would still be stymied and stuck.
That pattern of being stuck and confused and then OK for a little and then stuck and confused again led me to the conclusion that my Saboteur was showing up. She's there to stop me when I am process of manifesting my desires and this was a big one.
My coach then reminded me of all the great accomplishments that I have achieved as a result of working on this project. In fact, the most important part was complete. The rest was gravy. I thought about all the great success that I have enjoyed by allowing myself to feel the connection with my HigherSelf and how it has affected my work, my family, my friends, and this project. I started to appreciate all the things that I had learned. This appreciation helped to shift my thoughts and feelings. I realized that everything was clear and fine. My paralysis was about keeping the continued manifestation of this project away and no longer a wise sign of going slow.
I decided to have a little chat with my friend the Saboteur. She could be confident that I took her needs seriously and yet still go forward. I would take her hand and walk through the door with her. And when I made that decision, it was like an energy flood-gate was opened. Within a day I took two huge steps forward in this project. There was one piece that had a two week delay and so I blessed that delay and used it to review some details. The process was exciting and filled with "Yahoo!" and "I did it!" I celebrated each step. It felt great!
So, is your Saboteur showing up? Look for the signs: confusion, doubt, mistrust, fear, paralysis. Did you confirm things and still not feeling good about moving forward? Do you see the horror stories before you? Do you want something, but just can't take another step toward its manifestation? Perhaps it's time for a chat. A kind, gentle, but firm chat with your Saboteur. Yes, she has something to contribute and you will listen to her, but it will not stop you from moving toward your dream. Take her hand and take the next step.
Monday, March 16, 2009
The Power of Vision
Our family, (my husband, three kids, and I), just returned from Walt Disney World this weekend and I was so excited to reflect upon this trip here today. The excitement was due in part to the unanticipated thoughts and feelings I had while making the trek from car, to tram, to monorail, to Magic Kingdom. I was giddy and teary-eyed as my daughters and I spotted Cinderella's castle in the distance, the music swelled, and we noticed Mickey Mouse ear confetti on the ground. Here I am, almost 43 years old, and I could feel the magic of the place. (No, I don't work for Disney!)
The biggest recurring thought I had was about Walt Disney himself. He was a man with a vision. His vision was so clear and strong and passionate that it inspired hundreds and thousands to help him manifest this vision into the physical world. And here we were, so many years later, witnessing his creation. Just Magic Kingdom alone must be the size of 4 or 5 amusement parks. After three days of exploring it, we still did not see everything.
An accompanying thought was about the Disney characters and parade at 3 pm every afternoon. The parade displays many of the Disney characters on floats, with dancers sandwiched in between. All smiling and sweating and smiling some more. Everyone stays in character without fault. The kids are mesmerized and adults impressed. Once again the music made a huge impact because it called forth Walt Disney's "Secret" to his power. The song was about celebrating the dream come true, celebrate yourself, and that anything is possible.
I know it sounds hokey, but that is the central message to manifesting what you want. You must celebrate yourself and all your passions, desires, talents. You must celebrate your existence and that you are here to feel the joy and expansion of yourself. And if you want to manifest your desires, you must believe that your dreams will come true and that anything is possible- IF you believe it. When you feel good and you believe in your dream, the Universe- through people, events, ideas and so on- will bring to you what is needed for the dream to become alive. Yes, action is necessary part of this formula, but if you have a shaky belief, results are mixed at best.
For me, that was the magic of Disney. This magic that he subtly but directly was letting us in on. The formula for how he did it all. And, in that moment, I realized how a large part of my dream was coming true. My dream to remind my children about their own power of vision of their dreams in a world that often resists this power as childish.
It also rekindled my hope in my dream for my life- Yes, I am on the right track. Yes, if I keep the dream alive, so many people and events will come into my life to help me manifest it all. Within 48 hours of my return, I had one of my articles published and waiting for me in my pile of mail and a musician call me to coordinate the music for my CD of Guided Meditations. Amazing!
Have you celebrated yourself today? Have you seen the power of your vision? Can you believe in your dreams long enough so that others can be inspired as well and help you? If one man can build an empire of film, music, toys, theme parks, television and more, could you believe that you can see your dream come true? The world is waiting just for you...
The biggest recurring thought I had was about Walt Disney himself. He was a man with a vision. His vision was so clear and strong and passionate that it inspired hundreds and thousands to help him manifest this vision into the physical world. And here we were, so many years later, witnessing his creation. Just Magic Kingdom alone must be the size of 4 or 5 amusement parks. After three days of exploring it, we still did not see everything.
An accompanying thought was about the Disney characters and parade at 3 pm every afternoon. The parade displays many of the Disney characters on floats, with dancers sandwiched in between. All smiling and sweating and smiling some more. Everyone stays in character without fault. The kids are mesmerized and adults impressed. Once again the music made a huge impact because it called forth Walt Disney's "Secret" to his power. The song was about celebrating the dream come true, celebrate yourself, and that anything is possible.
I know it sounds hokey, but that is the central message to manifesting what you want. You must celebrate yourself and all your passions, desires, talents. You must celebrate your existence and that you are here to feel the joy and expansion of yourself. And if you want to manifest your desires, you must believe that your dreams will come true and that anything is possible- IF you believe it. When you feel good and you believe in your dream, the Universe- through people, events, ideas and so on- will bring to you what is needed for the dream to become alive. Yes, action is necessary part of this formula, but if you have a shaky belief, results are mixed at best.
For me, that was the magic of Disney. This magic that he subtly but directly was letting us in on. The formula for how he did it all. And, in that moment, I realized how a large part of my dream was coming true. My dream to remind my children about their own power of vision of their dreams in a world that often resists this power as childish.
It also rekindled my hope in my dream for my life- Yes, I am on the right track. Yes, if I keep the dream alive, so many people and events will come into my life to help me manifest it all. Within 48 hours of my return, I had one of my articles published and waiting for me in my pile of mail and a musician call me to coordinate the music for my CD of Guided Meditations. Amazing!
Have you celebrated yourself today? Have you seen the power of your vision? Can you believe in your dreams long enough so that others can be inspired as well and help you? If one man can build an empire of film, music, toys, theme parks, television and more, could you believe that you can see your dream come true? The world is waiting just for you...
Friday, March 6, 2009
Getting the Opportunity
I was channel-surfing the other night and stopped on Evan Almighty. Steve Carrell plays a congressman who is told by God, played by Morgan Freeman (of course), to build an ark because there is going to be a big flood. Sound familiar?
There was one moment in the film where Morgan (God), who is posing as a waiter in a restaurant, has a conversation with the confused wife of Steve Carrell. He says to her that she has an opportunity in this relationship. He states that when people pray to God for patience, they don't get patience. They do get an opportunity to be patient. I loved that!
I felt that this notion of having opportunities for becoming what we think we don't have or what we need really resonated with me. It comes down to this. We have and are everything! I mean everything. The Universe is contained inside us, just as we are part of the Universe.
We forget that. We don't believe it. We confirm our disbelief whenever we look outside ourselves for something that we think we don't have already. So, our relationships, so perfectly, provide us with opportunities to experience and be what we think we don't have.
I took Morgan (God) at his word and applied this idea to my life. When I was feeling impatient with my kids, I began to look for opportunities to be patient. They were certainly there, instantly. I took advantage of the opportunities at some times and not at others. When I did not take advantage, I found patience within myself for myself.
So, consider trying this at home: Think of what you are needing or wanting in your life. Is it peace, security, love, abundance, passion, patience? Whatever it is, see if you can see the opportunities to be those things with yourself and others. What happens? Let me know....
There was one moment in the film where Morgan (God), who is posing as a waiter in a restaurant, has a conversation with the confused wife of Steve Carrell. He says to her that she has an opportunity in this relationship. He states that when people pray to God for patience, they don't get patience. They do get an opportunity to be patient. I loved that!
I felt that this notion of having opportunities for becoming what we think we don't have or what we need really resonated with me. It comes down to this. We have and are everything! I mean everything. The Universe is contained inside us, just as we are part of the Universe.
We forget that. We don't believe it. We confirm our disbelief whenever we look outside ourselves for something that we think we don't have already. So, our relationships, so perfectly, provide us with opportunities to experience and be what we think we don't have.
I took Morgan (God) at his word and applied this idea to my life. When I was feeling impatient with my kids, I began to look for opportunities to be patient. They were certainly there, instantly. I took advantage of the opportunities at some times and not at others. When I did not take advantage, I found patience within myself for myself.
So, consider trying this at home: Think of what you are needing or wanting in your life. Is it peace, security, love, abundance, passion, patience? Whatever it is, see if you can see the opportunities to be those things with yourself and others. What happens? Let me know....
Saturday, February 21, 2009
"Nature is Change"
I gotta tell you that I love Pixar films. My kids love them, my husband loves them, and I could watch them over and over. And because I have three kids, I end up watching them over and over and over. Fine with me.
Recently, they've been into Ratatouille. In case you haven't seen it, it is about a rat named Remy who is passionate about food. He loves good food and happens to live in Paris, a mecca for great cooks and great food. The problem is, obviously, that he is a rat and humans don't look on rats in their houses, much less their kitchens, too kindly. As you may have guessed, he ends up cooking in the best restaurant in Paris and is elated.
Meanwhile, his father finds out what he is doing and is very disappointed and concerned. He does not trust humans because they have a history of killing rats. There is a very poignant scene when Remy's dad takes Remy to a shop that is selling rat poison. It has rat traps with rats hanging in them in the store front. The audience sees the brutality of "pest control" on display.
His father, making his point to Remy about the reality of how humans feel about rats states "You can't change nature." And Remy retorts "Change is nature."
My take on this exchange is that when you follow your passion, you can create what you want in this world. You can be a rat who loves cooking and food and against all odds, becomes a great chef in Paris. You can create different kinds of relationships between animals and humans and between humans and humans. Every moment is an opportunity to be different. To make a different choice. To tell a new story.
Have you been seeing things a certain way and can't conceive of things changing any time soon? Are you absolutely certain that "you can't change ______"? What rules have you made for yourself or others have made for you that have narrowed your point of view?
You may consider taking a step back and remembering that "change is nature". Change is our friend, not a scary thing that we try to avoid. Change allows us to look at things in a new way. It gives us wiggle room to see the infinite possibilities. Allow change. Welcome change. If you can, embrace change.
Leave your comments and insights about how change has served you in your life.
Recently, they've been into Ratatouille. In case you haven't seen it, it is about a rat named Remy who is passionate about food. He loves good food and happens to live in Paris, a mecca for great cooks and great food. The problem is, obviously, that he is a rat and humans don't look on rats in their houses, much less their kitchens, too kindly. As you may have guessed, he ends up cooking in the best restaurant in Paris and is elated.
Meanwhile, his father finds out what he is doing and is very disappointed and concerned. He does not trust humans because they have a history of killing rats. There is a very poignant scene when Remy's dad takes Remy to a shop that is selling rat poison. It has rat traps with rats hanging in them in the store front. The audience sees the brutality of "pest control" on display.
His father, making his point to Remy about the reality of how humans feel about rats states "You can't change nature." And Remy retorts "Change is nature."
My take on this exchange is that when you follow your passion, you can create what you want in this world. You can be a rat who loves cooking and food and against all odds, becomes a great chef in Paris. You can create different kinds of relationships between animals and humans and between humans and humans. Every moment is an opportunity to be different. To make a different choice. To tell a new story.
Have you been seeing things a certain way and can't conceive of things changing any time soon? Are you absolutely certain that "you can't change ______"? What rules have you made for yourself or others have made for you that have narrowed your point of view?
You may consider taking a step back and remembering that "change is nature". Change is our friend, not a scary thing that we try to avoid. Change allows us to look at things in a new way. It gives us wiggle room to see the infinite possibilities. Allow change. Welcome change. If you can, embrace change.
Leave your comments and insights about how change has served you in your life.
Friday, February 13, 2009
The Power of Love
I was watching my kids today. They were playing, eating Valentine's candy and to my surprise, actually sharing their candy with their siblings. It was good to see. My oldest had been looking forward to Valentine's Day for a while and it wasn't for the candy. It was for the love. She loves giving cards about love and of course, receiving them as well. She is open and generous with her love. My middle daughter loves to give kisses and squeezes and is always up for being carried around like a princess who is going off with her prince. My youngest, a son, is in constant state of "love me". He also gives kisses and hugs and asks for them often. That is the foundation of their life. It is the root of their survival. Giving and asking for love.
That is the power of love. Without it, we can cease to exist in this physical form or live a life where we feel dead. With it, we will not only live, but we thrive and blossom. In fact, love can change the planet. When just one person expresses and feels love, it has a ripple effect that can raise the vibration worldwide. It is our choice to add love to this world or to add fear.
Despite the crises that our world is facing, there is an increasing number of people awakening to this idea that love is powerful and that the solution to our challenges comes from love and not fear. Our fear-based thinking is limited at best, self-destructive at its worst.
How do you love more? Choose to love yourself first. Choose to have the best, more inspired idea of yourself, forgive everything else, and do the same for others. Choose to see people not as their roles, beliefs, politics, religion, jobs, spouses, friends or children, but as who they really are. They are waiting for love to show them to themselves.
Not clear about this notion of love? Think of the kindest thought you could have for yourself right now. Now even kinder...I know you can do it. That is evidence of self-love. Now, have that kind thought for another person. A thought that a really loving parent would have for their child. More evidence of love and loving. As you choose these loving thoughts more and more, see what happens in the next hour, day, week. See the power of love in your life.
If you get a chance, check out this music video!
That is the power of love. Without it, we can cease to exist in this physical form or live a life where we feel dead. With it, we will not only live, but we thrive and blossom. In fact, love can change the planet. When just one person expresses and feels love, it has a ripple effect that can raise the vibration worldwide. It is our choice to add love to this world or to add fear.
Despite the crises that our world is facing, there is an increasing number of people awakening to this idea that love is powerful and that the solution to our challenges comes from love and not fear. Our fear-based thinking is limited at best, self-destructive at its worst.
How do you love more? Choose to love yourself first. Choose to have the best, more inspired idea of yourself, forgive everything else, and do the same for others. Choose to see people not as their roles, beliefs, politics, religion, jobs, spouses, friends or children, but as who they really are. They are waiting for love to show them to themselves.
Not clear about this notion of love? Think of the kindest thought you could have for yourself right now. Now even kinder...I know you can do it. That is evidence of self-love. Now, have that kind thought for another person. A thought that a really loving parent would have for their child. More evidence of love and loving. As you choose these loving thoughts more and more, see what happens in the next hour, day, week. See the power of love in your life.
If you get a chance, check out this music video!
 | 7 min - Mar 28, 2007 - A choice for humanity, Love or Fear. What do you choose? www.youtube.com/watch?v=AMOMgQCRAqM |
Monday, January 19, 2009
Is Your Egg Cracking?
The other day my 6 year old daughter proposed playing a powerful game with me. She said that she wanted me to pretend to be the "mommie spider" and she was my spider egg. She sat, all curled up, on my lap. She said that I loved my egg so much. Then the egg starts to crack and I get scared that I'm losing it. Finally, I see that inside this egg is a baby spider. I am elated to see that I now I have something even better.
Now, the reason I thought this was a powerful game was because it felt like a metaphor for what so often happens in our lives. We have our "eggs" in life. We focus on them and nurture them and love them. We become very attached. Until one day, the eggs start to crack. We start to worry or even panic, because our eggs are breaking. Things are changing drastically and we don't know what will happen. Our lives are falling apart. But, the Universe knows something that we don't. There is a baby spider inside that egg. The egg needs to crack for the baby to come out and show itself.
So, when things start to fall apart or change or crack I'm not so afraid. Sometimes, when I'm feeling more connected, I even get excited. What will come of this cracking? What little baby spider will emerge from this breaking up? There's nothing to do, but watch, stay alert, and be open to what is.
Anything cracking or breaking apart in your life right now? Are you worried about the unknown future? You will be able to handle what ever happens. In fact, all you have to do is stay connected and stay alert. The rest will be shown to you. You might just be pleasantly surprised.
Now, the reason I thought this was a powerful game was because it felt like a metaphor for what so often happens in our lives. We have our "eggs" in life. We focus on them and nurture them and love them. We become very attached. Until one day, the eggs start to crack. We start to worry or even panic, because our eggs are breaking. Things are changing drastically and we don't know what will happen. Our lives are falling apart. But, the Universe knows something that we don't. There is a baby spider inside that egg. The egg needs to crack for the baby to come out and show itself.
So, when things start to fall apart or change or crack I'm not so afraid. Sometimes, when I'm feeling more connected, I even get excited. What will come of this cracking? What little baby spider will emerge from this breaking up? There's nothing to do, but watch, stay alert, and be open to what is.
Anything cracking or breaking apart in your life right now? Are you worried about the unknown future? You will be able to handle what ever happens. In fact, all you have to do is stay connected and stay alert. The rest will be shown to you. You might just be pleasantly surprised.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
You Can Have Anything You Want!
Sometime ago, when I was in a half-asleep, half-awake state, I heard a voice say to me "You can have anything you want." Almost instantly, I became panicked and terrified. I started to breathe shallowly and it took me a bit to calm down and get oriented.
You would think that the prospect of having anything I wanted would be an exciting discovery- a glorious truth. It is true. I can have anything I want...and so can you. So, why the fear? After becoming still about it and going through my day I realized the dilemma I was facing that was causing such terror. I had been giving up what I wanted for the sake of others. I had been sacrificing my desires, denying myself, betraying myself because I held the belief that it was an either/or proposition. In other words, if I wanted something, say, a friendship, I needed to give something up, like my preferences or tastes, for that friendship to survive. Was this true? I mean, did I really need to do that to keep a friendship? I had certainly set it up that way. It seemed to work that way with no complaint from the other person. But, was it really true?
In my peaceful space, it was certainly not. I could have a thriving friendship and not deny who I was or what I wanted or what I thought. But, in that wounded, fearful belief, it was just not possible to maintain a friendship and not deny myself. After all, I had set it up that way and played it out over and over again.
I believe that many women often hold a version of this belief whether consciously or unconsciously. It can come up in your marriage, your relationship with your kids, your in-laws, even yourself. What have you been denying of yourself in order to keep up the front of perfection, happiness, or harmony? Does the prospect of having anything you want frighten you? If it does, it may be that you think you need to sacrifice your relationships to get what you really want. But, then again, if you can have anything you want, then you could have relationships and everything else, no?
If you are not sure what you believe about this, here's a little guide. Does asking for what you want make you a little anxious? Do you ever apologize to others for no reason? Are you hesitant to tell your loved ones what you really think? Do you ever put your needs after others? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, you may be holding the belief of "I can't have what I truly want and have close relationships-one or the other must go." Do some exploring within yourself. You may find what is holding you back..
You would think that the prospect of having anything I wanted would be an exciting discovery- a glorious truth. It is true. I can have anything I want...and so can you. So, why the fear? After becoming still about it and going through my day I realized the dilemma I was facing that was causing such terror. I had been giving up what I wanted for the sake of others. I had been sacrificing my desires, denying myself, betraying myself because I held the belief that it was an either/or proposition. In other words, if I wanted something, say, a friendship, I needed to give something up, like my preferences or tastes, for that friendship to survive. Was this true? I mean, did I really need to do that to keep a friendship? I had certainly set it up that way. It seemed to work that way with no complaint from the other person. But, was it really true?
In my peaceful space, it was certainly not. I could have a thriving friendship and not deny who I was or what I wanted or what I thought. But, in that wounded, fearful belief, it was just not possible to maintain a friendship and not deny myself. After all, I had set it up that way and played it out over and over again.
I believe that many women often hold a version of this belief whether consciously or unconsciously. It can come up in your marriage, your relationship with your kids, your in-laws, even yourself. What have you been denying of yourself in order to keep up the front of perfection, happiness, or harmony? Does the prospect of having anything you want frighten you? If it does, it may be that you think you need to sacrifice your relationships to get what you really want. But, then again, if you can have anything you want, then you could have relationships and everything else, no?
If you are not sure what you believe about this, here's a little guide. Does asking for what you want make you a little anxious? Do you ever apologize to others for no reason? Are you hesitant to tell your loved ones what you really think? Do you ever put your needs after others? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, you may be holding the belief of "I can't have what I truly want and have close relationships-one or the other must go." Do some exploring within yourself. You may find what is holding you back..
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